This question makes me so happy you're here! I'm going to answer in parts because my response has gotten a bit long already and I want ensure that my answers are providing clarity--which is hard when I get as verbose and impassioned as I often do with this topic!

1. Q: Why do you lead with and specialize in child free?

To answer the first one--you can see a long and detailed answer I gave in another comment here.

2. Q: Do you find that the challenges by people choosing (or chosen for) this lifestyle are that unique or require such special attention?

Some of this is answered already in the link I have above but I will elaborate a bit here as well. From both professional and personal experience, I would say the concerns within choosing and embracing this lifestyle isn't "unique" in its difficulty. I also am acutely aware it isn't nearly as difficult as other life choices or experiences that others may have.

However, it is a deviation from the general worldwide expectation of a womxn's role (in particular) in society. The uniqueness is in the privilege that more and more are afforded to make the choice versus caving to pressures or being forced to follow the "rules."

And in doing so, the expected judgement, criticism, isolation, and general lost feeling that comes from deviating from the norm becomes more prevalent. These are a few of the issues I work through with my clients as they navigate the "what's next" aspect of their lives.

Specifically because there is a common trope of the childfree womxn: work is her "child," dislikes children, has mountains of money, travels all the time, etc. This in itself becomes a pressure that many childfree don't subscribe to--to once again they don't "fit in" to a mold that people understand.

The above pressures are in addition to those from the other side of the continuum who view the choice as "selfish & immature." This side of the continuum also outwardly expresses the POV that childfree people are only "that way" because they "haven't met the right person yet."

What this leads to is struggling to find an identity. As I previously mentioned, I don't believe it is entirely unique. As lack of identity is often common in other populations (including mothers). What I see as unique is the path to address and work through finding a values based fulfilling life is different.

I am struggling to think of any research I have read where a culture isn't primarily grooming young girls to be mothers at some point. Which means that even in your case and millions of others, that is the exception.

For many, especially those raised in more conservative, religious, and/or smaller communities it takes a TON of courage to break the mold and be the "black sheep." Not only in that moment, but also because the questions, judgement, lack of understanding continues for years--Im 16 years in and still get "bingo'd" at least once a week.

Ok--whew, I'll post this one and answer more of your question in another comment.

>4) Q: I'm also interested in any patterns you've found e.g regional differences or personality traits of people struggling with their child free journey?

If I were a natural researcher, versus a consumer of research, this would be something I'd love to dig into. Dr. Amy Blackstone has been researching the childfree since 2008 and has great information on the group as a whole.

With that said, I am going to answer this question from my personal experience and anecdotal examples. If you are wanting more of a global answer let me know and I can get into the research and let you know.

I haven't found as much of a regional difference outside of the usual differences we see between urban, suburban, and rural areas. I believe much of this is more related to SES, association with religious organizations, educational systems, etc.

Personality traits is a FUN one--because personality itself is a fun one. My professional view is that we are shaped by all the stimuli we are exposed to throughout our lives including our generational lessons and experiences.

What I have found is those who expressly choose to be childfree (not are childfree by happenstance or childless by circumstance) have been either parent-ified as children in one way or another. This and/or seeing the struggle of parents (theirs or others) in raising children.

Which is a direct opposition from the "Leave it to Beaver" model of family. So the choice to break from that feels more "obvious." However, it isn't necessarily easier.

Another trait, is the opposite of those above and those are the "lost child" and/or one of many that have not had the pressures placed on them.

Additionally, those who are childfree and it wasn't necessarily a choice but timing and/or partnering never worked out also demonstrate one of the things the many don't understand and that is -- they never felt the internal drive to prioritize having kids.

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I'm happy to discuss more if you're interested!

>Thank you for your patience with my break. I'm going to keep working through this one. I love it so much and want to provide as much as I can for you and the thread.
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>3) Q: If so, please elaborate on the specific challenges or themes you find!

In addition to what I have already mentioned, persons who have chosen to be childfree and those who are childless by circumstance and now embracing life without kids is the, what feels like, constant attempts from others to "change our minds" or "pity" or "problem solving" that is forced on us in social environments.

For example, for the childless many will discuss ways they or "people they know" have been successful in conceiving and carrying to term. Tons of advice on how the childless can "fix" the "problem" of living without children.

Similarly, the childfree by choice are often faced with opinions that are based from the POV that those who do have children have chosen a "better" life.

In both of these examples, especially since these aren't uncommon or rare by any means, the receiver of these messages are fundamentally -- "you're different and we don't like it so we need to fix you" and/or "you're a bad person."

I do admit those statements are reductionistic and generalized. I also am knowledgeable of how the conscious and subconscious parts of our brain process information. The latter takes in information and does just that--simplifies it to fit into a category that activates the sympathetic nervous system or the parasympathetic nervous system (scary stimuli or safe stimuli, respectively).

So, when we think about themes and specific challenges of the childfree and childless it really is about working through the all too big question "who am I" and then "where do I fit into the world?"

Often the childfree and childless will attempt and be welcomed initially by those who love and care for them. The goal is to live as if the choice they made or that their bodies made doesn't make them different (because remember "different = bad"). So instead there is a shrinking that happens. A guilt for having different interests, more money or more time, a desire to branch out of the expected.

And as with any group that is not in the "majority" there is a loneliness that comes from feeling like the only one or somehow broken.

The latter is much more common for childless by circumstance persons but also for the childfree by choice like me who don't have a "maternal clock" or the desire to have babies. From the first stories we are told as young girls is that our bodies were MADE to have kids...and sure I have all the organs that in theory would allow me to do that so choosing not to use them in that way can, for some, feel like a betrayal.

Although there are a ton more themes, I'll finally mention religion as one of the largest forces behind the pressure to reproduce. Edin & Kefalas (2011) discussed how specifically in the Catholic faith marriage has historically been taught as "primarily procreative." Which is one of many examples of the lessons taught to "be fruitful and multiply."

Oh, this is such a great question! I'm curious to hear the answer to this too.