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la_peregrine t1_j9wb014 wrote

Wtf has that to do with it..never forget doesn't mean always bend over backwards.

I'll never forget the library lady who bought me a cheap plane ticket so I can do a summer REU thing at a prestigious institution when I had 5 dollars in my bank account. I know that changed things for me. If she had called asking for help when my SO was in the hospital, it is unlikely I'd have been able to help. Tbh that is not when I could help other s bit when I needed even more help.

But other times? If she wanted help with figuring things out, she could always call me and I'd listen and say. Yup let me teach you this or can't right now but I can look at it tonight or this weekend and get back to you tomorrow or on Monday, if that works for you.

(Past tense because she sadly passed away)

But even going further, it doesn't have to be big spoons. It can be small ones. Today I have extra time to help a colleague. Yeah I could goof around but being aware of people who've helped me and not forgetting them means that instead I will look for a colleague who might need a bit of help.

This is what it means..sometimes use upa spoon you'd use on yourself to help someone. How many spoons and how often depends on circumstances.

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PoopEndeavor t1_j9wei9r wrote

Yeah. I don't think you understood my point. I'm with you as far as be appreciative and try to return the favor to people who've helped you. My point is the last part is unnecessary because it implies you shouldn't help the people who "made excuses."

If a friend has an excuse why they can't help me today, it doesn't mean I'm gonna say eff you when they need help next time. I'll help them just as I'd help the person who helped me. There's lots of reasons someone might not be able to help you, it doesn't mean they aren't worth your consideration.

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la_peregrine t1_j9wh0nt wrote

No theblast part is not.unnecessary.

Yes not everyone can help every time. But there are also people who never help.

So don't forget that there are people who never help anyone. They are not worth of your help.

When I was I college, we helped each other move things. Now people moved at different times and not everyone could help everyone else. But if you never helped people move, when it was your turn to move, you got no help.

Remember those who help you (even if they help you by helping your friends so your friends can help you) and also remember those who never help.

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