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Turbogato t1_j3q66y3 wrote

This. My brother always wants me to hang out with him, but every time, no matter where we are at, he is constantly insulting me in front of strangers.

I tried to bring it up to him but he always tells me “get over it p*#!* it’s just a joke.”

Once he started insulting me and my therapy sessions I had to block him.

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Deezus1229 t1_j3raeut wrote

My sister is like this too. She doesn't beg me to hang out but I'm the first person she'll reach out to when she needs something. And then insult me and cut me down in front of friends and family the first chance she gets.

I'm about to move 5 hours away and regret nothing about it.

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VanillaBryce5 t1_j3rzv70 wrote

I moved 5 hours away from my family for similar reasons, and my life so much better then I could have ever imagined. Good luck on your new adventures! Hopefully you find some new tasty places to eat!

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Deezus1229 t1_j3u524s wrote

I'm moving to Austin with my (almost) husband 4 days after the wedding, I hear there's no shortage of good food!

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paulohbear t1_j3v3iuy wrote

My 6 siblings and I quite unintentionally distributed ourselves just about as far apart as possible. LA, Seattle, North ID, Chicago, Denver, Virginia. I think it was subconscious. We get along a lot better theses days, but we mostly converse via group text. One brother keeps trying to proselytize, and we keep having to shut him down.

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Cash907 t1_j3rduqr wrote

Or you could just give back what he was dishing? Confront him on the real reason he does it directly instead of asking your therapist to make a best guess. Recently both my parents suffered a medical setback, and I’ve tried to be there as much as I can but they live in another state. My sibling, who rarely talks to them, started texting and occasionally dishes on me for not being there more. Instead of letting it sit, I called her directly to advise her my job and family don’t allow me to be there 24/7 and asked why she, someone who is unemployed with no kids in the house, hasn’t been there once since this issue started. That shut her up fast and she hasn’t brought it up once.

Facing adversity is not only part of adulting, it’s how you strengthen personal resolve. Hiding from it, while the easier immediate solution, only sets you up for failure when things you can’t hide from come into your life.

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Sergnb t1_j3ryt30 wrote

Or he could not engage in shit behavior just because someone else is? Why should he HAVE to bother doing something he actively detests just to posture? It’s perfectly fine to not want to deal with any of that, and he’s not responsible for it happening towards him either.

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Turbogato t1_j3sj1mw wrote

This point. I choose not to engage and fire back. I’m too old for that. I’d just rather stay away.

It isn’t running away, it is choosing not to surround myself with individuals who only try to put you down to make themselves feel better.

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cherrybounce t1_j3sk8yk wrote

I tried to bring it up to him but he always tells me "get over it p#!* it's just a joke!*

Sometimes confronting bullies doesn’t work. They simply won’t acknowledge their behavior is wrong. It’s often the best decision to refuse to engage.

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8bitbebop4 t1_j3si7ha wrote

Seriously. If you say you're offended and it doesn't change, then maybe just stop talking to me.

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