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nyafff t1_j375bs4 wrote

Good days arent 'earned' get out of here with this toxic shit.

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Thirdwhirly t1_j378nyr wrote

Right? This is the kind of thing that keeps people from going to therapy when they absolutely need therapy.

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IJustBeTalking t1_j37z60v wrote

It’s not earning through effort it’s earning through experience. The post is saying if you get through a bunch of bad days, that required getting through the bad day: you’ve earned yourself a good day to enjoy. It’s not saying “you don’t get a good day if you haven’t earned it” the post gives no qualifications for good days.

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ValyrianJedi t1_j37arcy wrote

How on earth is that toxic?

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nyafff t1_j37bkya wrote

Because it suggests that enduring suffering is the way to deserve a good day, does a child waking up to have a nice day have to earn that? No, then why should our good days be contingent on suffering or be treated as some kind of reward. We deserve good days because we are human, not because we paid some arbitrary penance.

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ShvoogieCookie t1_j37k9vl wrote

True. Victims of abuse may cope with that but nobody should just rely on hope it going to turn better for you because the universe decided to reward you or not. Idly waiting for karma can be a very tragic path.

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Dan3099 t1_j37g6iy wrote

I don’t think that’s what it suggests. You HAVE TO fight through the bad days because what’s the alternative? You let one literally kill you.

By literally surviving the bad days you earn the rest of your life, including those good days that you would have never made it to had you given up the fight.

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ValyrianJedi t1_j37dmfs wrote

Kids have other people take care of all their needs though. Adults don't. If you're having a good day it's because you've done everything needed to and put yourself in a position to do so.

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nyafff t1_j37dzze wrote

Not all children do and putting yourself in a position to have a good day isnt the same as enduring suffering in order to earn the right to a good day.

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ValyrianJedi t1_j37exim wrote

Right, and the ones who don't also don't wake up to nice days. It honestly kind of blows my mind that this is even a debatable topic. You aren't just magically going to have good days when you haven't done anything to ensure or create them. Literally just surviving requires work.

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nyafff t1_j37fvh5 wrote

Im not talking about magically having good days Im talking about this toxic positivity that suggests in order to have good days they need to be earned by suffering.

>It honestly kind of blows my mind that this is even a debatable topic

Go away then.

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ValyrianJedi t1_j37g7th wrote

Kinda sounds like you just want something to be up in arms over.

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JustKapping t1_j37lbmp wrote

no, you just completely don’t see the point. there’s no correlation between a bad day and a good day. one doesn’t increase the likelihood of the other. no one’s saying be a lazyass. what’s wrong with you? just confidently not using logic.

read a real book, valyrian jedi

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Hoozuki_Suigetsu t1_j379ae1 wrote

They are earned

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Burgling_Hobbit_ t1_j37y5yg wrote

Why/How? While there are certain types of "good" or "best" days that can be earned, some are just super simple. One of my best days was when I was a kid on family vacation to the beach. Sure my parents worked to earn that. I was just born into a family lucky enough to go to the beach that one weekend.

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Hoozuki_Suigetsu t1_j37yth9 wrote

Because every good day i've had in the past year it was due to decisions that i took.

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remag_nation t1_j386717 wrote

by that logic you also earn bad days with different decisions. None of this factors in the stuff that happens outside of our choices though.

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Hoozuki_Suigetsu t1_j386uvb wrote

sure, keep thinking that way, it's easier to blame other people choices or luck.

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Confused_guacamole t1_j36xx4a wrote

463 consecutive bad days and still counting

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hairysnowmonkey t1_j375kk9 wrote

You're due for a good one, you deserve it.

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[deleted] t1_j375nm9 wrote

Why do you have to “earn” the best days of your life?

This sounds like more of the nice sounding but quite toxic nonsense that helps people to take comfort in their current suffering but do nothing to change it.

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DerelictMyOwnBalls t1_j3acr0x wrote

My thoughts, too. I’m sorry tired of the idea that we have to earn peace/a living/etc as if we’re born completely undeserving of these things.

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ChairForceOnes t1_j37tvav wrote

You don't have to earn them, but you won't know they're the best days of your life without having the bad days to compare them to.

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Burgling_Hobbit_ t1_j37xrxh wrote

..... best is best. You don't have to have an F in a class assignment to know your best grade on an assignment was the 100. It doesn't matter if all your other grades were 99. The 100 is still your best and will feel damn good.

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ChairForceOnes t1_j381ub1 wrote

If you get 99s on everything you have nothing to compare. There's neither a bad grade nor a best grade.

Once you get a 100 you now have a best grade and worst grade (or bad grades in comparison to the best grade).

Maybe I'm misunderstanding though.

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Burgling_Hobbit_ t1_j388grf wrote

I can agree that bad grades, or bad days, are not necessary.

You don't need to have something be bad to know when you experience the best.

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Giggle_Buttons t1_j389nzz wrote

I second this. I know from personal experience. Those bad days really do make you appreciate even some of the most uneventful and melancholy of days.

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ValyrianJedi t1_j37ausr wrote

Because nothing just materializes out of thin air

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[deleted] t1_j37en74 wrote

You think that good days don’t just “materialise” out of thin air but all the bad days that you have to apparently fight your way through do?

Edited to stay on point

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ValyrianJedi t1_j37fj0v wrote

Yes. There are a decent many externalities required to have a good day, and none to have a bad one.

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[deleted] t1_j37fniy wrote

I totally disagree. Again, I would ask why you think that?

So your default state is a bad day unless some number of external events come together to produce a good day for you?

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ValyrianJedi t1_j37g2sb wrote

Take just the absolute basics of food and shelter. Hard to have a good day when you are starving and homeless. You have to do things to avoid being starving and homeless, and taking no action whatsoever will lead to both. All of the prerequisites of somebody having a good day require action being taken. No action has to be taken to have a bad day.

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[deleted] t1_j37nl6x wrote

Without finding one absolute extreme. My point is that happiness is an internal state, separate your external circumstances. Your mood is a choice.

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angeltati t1_j37srzb wrote

This is bullshit. No one has to have a bad day or suffer.

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Giggle_Buttons t1_j3893yo wrote

Technically, but those bad days really make you appreciate the good ones. This is like the definition of having children lol

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angeltati t1_j3946nk wrote

For me, it makes me not enjoy the good days because I'm just waiting for the next bad day and thinking how bad it will be. A lot of that anxiety is because of traumatic events in my life. I honestly feel like if I didn't have certain events happen to me, I would have more happy days that I'm not concerned about the next bad moment.

I will also say not to worry about my mental health: I work on it every day and have strategies to work through the anxiety and worries. I have a very good life with people who genuinely love me and I love them.

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justahmedig t1_j381klp wrote

Definitly you should. It's like struggling with studying and wasting your time on some subjects you probably would't use in real life but at the end you are going to achieve academic success

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lilacpulse t1_j37sxfo wrote

This reminded me of a Manager I had when I was in my early 20s. That time (in that company), we work Mondays to Saturdays 8hrs per day, even on Saturdays.

One time, the team was just chatting about work hours when this Manager said, "Don't you appreciate Sundays more because of [our company]?" None of us reacted immediately. But then a colleague said quietly and respectfully, "BuT ma'am, that means we only have one day off for church, chores, family and rest".

Manager just shrugged her shoulders, "But you KNOW that you earned it".

Boy am I glad I left that company.

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DanteTrd t1_j37r9s0 wrote

What if I'm tired of fighting?

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Smrtihara t1_j36zgbj wrote

This unhinged layout REALLY bothers me. I mean, WHAT is going on with the text?!

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BigWhiteDog t1_j37iyrj wrote

So when do the best days start? Life has been getting progressively worse since 2015 and I'm about to lose my house and dog rescue in the next month or so. When do the bast days start for me?

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Cogexkin t1_j385u5s wrote

I fucking hate this bullshit lol why am I subbed to this

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BeddingtonBlvd t1_j38d1f0 wrote

I must be in for a jackpot of best days =\

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maapunk t1_j38igrz wrote

Hell nah. Why do I have to EARN a good day. 😭😂

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wise_quoter t1_j3903i0 wrote

Count your blessings instead of your problems.

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melskymob t1_j38i06w wrote

Eat shit for few years then eat caviar the rest of your life or something.

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axelbigman t1_j39v5x1 wrote

It doesn’t work like that. For some, all life is a Disneyland, but for some it’s a constant torture. Yeah, you can say it’s a state of mind and soul but y’all know I’m right.

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IJustBeTalking t1_j3807wa wrote

people arguing with the fundamentals of life lol take away the words “fight through” and “earn” and replace them with “get through” and “get to”, then you will understand the message.

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Humble_Paint_1493 t1_j3ad2eu wrote

Do I have to endure all the abuse to get to my good days?

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SomeonePrettyNice t1_j3bw26w wrote

How many bad days must catch thine hands before good days arrive?

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Lilimaej t1_j37e561 wrote

It is true.. but hard at times!!!

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CareerAdviceThrowMe t1_j37ke5v wrote

You to through some days earn best of have fight bad to the days your life

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StrangeArugula1066 t1_j37xv42 wrote

Yes! You can't experience the good and better days if you are not able to experience the bad and bitter ones. :)

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Enough-Raise-3983 t1_j38kqvq wrote

these rough patches are gonna push you out of your comfort zone and give you a fresh look at life. It'll help you expand your views and learn some new things. These tough times will build you up and make you a stronger person. When it's all said and done, you'll be able to handle any situation that comes your way like a champ. Keep your head up and keep grindin', you'll reach new heights in no time.

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rosickness12 t1_j37zj65 wrote

I've always thought the bad days make the good days even better. If all you know are good days, then what can you use to compare that to?

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