I tried to deal with my depression this year. The only thing i accomplished was quitting my meds because it was too much effort to call the doctors office for a refill every month.

Well, i think i can say getting an unpaid job (not volunteer) was also a good thing. Even as 2 days a week and 2,5 hours a day. I put that down to 1 day a week since i moved to a new rental house in november, which took so much energy that i needed a break.

Next year is going to be a waste year. Im having a very heavy surgery (getting a permanent small intestine stoma, for which they have to open my whole stomach) around late january, early february, and i will have a long recovery time. I ordered a laptop because while in bed/on the couch i wont be able to play games, work on my books/writing, or watch series/movies on my pc.

I dont have plans for after that. Im just going to focus on learning to live with my new body and accepting how i will look with a bag on my body. I bet no guy wants to share a night with me anymore (: