My theory is that so long as school funding is so heavily linked to where people live via local taxes I don’t think you can. People who live in affluent towns have a heavy incentive (both in preserving home values and opportunities for their own children) to oppose affordable multi-unit housing, specifically the kind that allows more families to move in, because by definition that means a sharp uptick in students attending local schools without a corresponding increase in funding, resulting in less overall resources for existing students. The same argument can be (and is) made for other local resources btw, such as roads/traffic, public sewer, access to nature etc.

It’s understandable that the discourse gets so personal because both sides have heavy stakes in the outcome: people who need affordable housing versus those who need to preserve their investment in the exclusivity/character/whatever of their town.