A guy suspects his wife is cheating on him so he comes home early from work one day. His wife meets him at the door in a bathrobe, her hair a mess. “Where is he?” he demands. “Where’s the guy who’s been sleeping with you?” “I don’t know what you’re talking about, dear,” she answers, so the guy tears the house apart looking for him. Finally he’s on the second floor in the kitchen, he looks out the window and sees a guy sitting in a Volkswagen. “That’s him,” the guy thinks. “That’s the guy who’s been sleeping with my wife!” He’s so furious, he picks up the refrigerator, throws it out the window, has a heart attack, and dies.

St. Peter meets him at the gates of Heaven. “Why are you here?” he asks and the guy answers, “I knew my wife was cheating on me so I came home early. I saw her boyfriend sitting in his Volkswagen out on the street, threw the refrigerator at him, had a heart attack, and died.” St. Peter scowls and says, “You don’t belong here. Go to hell.” He pulls a big lever, a trap door opens, and the guy disappears.

A couple of minutes later another guy comes up to St. Peter at the gates of Heaven. “What are you doing here?” St. Peter asks and the guy answers, “I don’t know! I was just sitting in my Volkswagen, minding my own business, when somebody threw a refrigerator at me!” St. Peter wags his finger at him and says, “I heard about you. You go to hell too!” He pulls the big lever, the trap door opens, and the guy disappears.

A couple of minutes later another guy comes up to St. Peter at the gates of Heaven. “What are you doing here?” St. Peter asks and the guy answers, “I don’t know! I was just sitting in a refrigerator, minding my own business…”

Donald Trump was walking through Manhattan and saw a long queue. Wondering what is was for, he joined it.

People would look over their shoulder, see that is was Donald Trump behind them, and leave the queue, so he would proceed closer and closer to the front.

As he was getting closer to the head of the queue, he asked one guy, who also looked and was about to walk away, "Wait a second, what is this queue for and why are you now leaving it?"

The man said "This is the queue for Canadian Immigration Visas, but if you are getting one, I don't need one now."

4 friends (Ladies) meet 30 years after school at reunion.

One goes to get food while the other 3 start to talk about how successful their sons became.

The first lady says her son studied economics, became a banker and is so rich he gave his best friend a Ferrari.

The second said her son became a pilot, started his own airline, became so rich he gave his best friend a jet.

No. 3 said her son became an architect, started his own development company, and became so rich he built his best friend a castle.

The fourth lady came back with a plate full of food and asked what the buzz was about.

They told her about how successful their sons became and asked her about her son.

She said that her son is a gay stripper and he works in a strip club.

The other 3 said she must be very disappointed with her son for not becoming successful.

"Oh no!! He is doing extremely well” said the lady, "last week on his birthday he got a Ferrari, a jet and a castle from 3 of his boyfriends..."

A skeleton walks into a bar, orders a beer and a mop.