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RomanticBeyondBelief t1_j2fuw3o wrote

shake your booty, make that cork pop, and shoot it from your butt like a projectile with the pressure of the fizz

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chookine123 t1_j2fuy3h wrote

break it. all the little shards will fall out

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jas656 t1_j2fuznq wrote

You squeeze a surgical balloon in past it and inflate it, and then pull the whole lot out with a string.

Saw it on a TV show once.

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LucyDanger_ t1_j2fv77o wrote

ER nurse here. Go to the ER now. Seriously. We've seen worse. Really.

90

janice-mericson t1_j2fv98m wrote

At an ER.. I’ve seen this occur more times than I can count. Just don’t take it out yourself if it’s completely in, for the love of god.

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spylican t1_j2fvagx wrote

Tie one end of a rope to the bottle and the other to a doorknob then slam the door.

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ChrisVonae t1_j2fvek9 wrote

Which end was inserted? The bottle neck or base? 🤔

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Buford1991 t1_j2fvihl wrote

Hospital because the suction will rip your intestines out if you pull too hard.

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Trick_Machinez t1_j2fvnn6 wrote

your best option is to push it all the way in and let your stomach do the rest

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bettram77 t1_j2fvofw wrote

Drink more champagne and do the biggest fart,good luck old chap!

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monteqzuma t1_j2fvtnm wrote

Put a mouse up your rectum to chew on the cork until it releases the pressure to release the bottle, then send in a cat to chase the mouse out. Duh

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The-Ink_Demon t1_j2fvu0s wrote

I feel like that question is best answered by a doctor. Please locate a local er to ensure whoever the sufferer is may receive proper care for its removal

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Trick_Machinez t1_j2fvxjo wrote

another option is to tie a string to it and attach it to someone’s tow bar and get them to drive off and hope for the best

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emma7734 t1_j2fvxs4 wrote

Don’t pull it out. Push it through.

1

Bak3904 t1_j2fvz0p wrote

I will say but I got some questions first

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Due-Broccoli-4164 t1_j2fvzyc wrote

someone must put a very long straw through your mouth, throat and gut into the champagne and push some air to the champagne. it will create bubbles and create a force similar to a rocket.

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Diedrogen t1_j2fw4fx wrote

Asking for yourself or a friend?

1

Jack41tack t1_j2fw502 wrote

I’m intrigued but, find an alcoholic and they should remove the bottle and drink it

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Able-Telephone4541 t1_j2fwfjw wrote

Put it in the bottle return machine and let the machine do the rest

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PurgaznNings t1_j2fwgiv wrote

Please go to the ER. They see crazy shit everyday. I think that won't shock them.

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Trillium19 t1_j2fwtz5 wrote

The ER is the only way. They won’t even be phased.

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guywhomightbewrong t1_j2fx27q wrote

My first answer to remove it is to never insert it in the first place. But I’d think the safest way is to break the glass at the bottom of the bottle to release pressure the pull the bottle out but the cork is probably coming off so hospital after that. The biggest flaw in this is breaking the glass without fucking yourself up

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tinfoil3346 t1_j2fx88q wrote

Go to the ER and have a doctor do it. Don't attempt to do it yourself.

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Ok-Bed-6832 t1_j2fx8ip wrote

who hasn’t been there before 🤣👍 i’ve found the best method is sticking another one in to push bottle 1 farther into the colon! good luck

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Ranger188c t1_j2fx8tt wrote

Remove the cork. Fart in the bottle it will fly out. You're welcome!

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Salty_Jalapeno t1_j2fxeej wrote

Are you sure its not a small cilinder stuck inside another, slightly larger cilinder...

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tacobot2 t1_j2fxlim wrote

Have the gerbil eat the cork

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Frequent_Minimum4871 t1_j2fxmws wrote

Replying to LucyDanger_ (#1,256,009)

#PLEASE TELL US MORE! 🤩

*I heard a story long ago from a nurse she said they keep a box containing all the things collected over the years (as majority simply leave without collecting belongings afterwards)

She said they let the NEW nurses pick a prize from the box as an initiation 🤣

1